At my house, we didn’t celebrate Halloween. That house that handed out Jesus flyers with your Tootsie Rolls? That was us. So pardon me if I don’t really see the point in dressing up as a sexy nurse or a sexy pirate or a sexy Big Bird. Big Bird? That’s right: Big Bird. However, in thinking of what I, as a well-educated, well-read adult female in a mutually beneficial relationship, would consider dressing up as for a night filled with tricks, candy, and six year-olds dressed up as prostitutes it finally came to me…
That’s right, this powerful symbol of early-90’s womanhood may just be the perfect costume for you. And what better woman to emulate? Taking charge of her life after rehab (or as Lisa taught us to call it: The New Boarding School), she is a woman with fabulous style and a great career, not to mention numerous intelligent men surrounding her. In 1992, chose to keep an illegitimate pregnancy and become a single mother prompting criticism from the then vice president. And in 1997 she battled breast cancer, sparking another controversy when she chose to smoke medical marijuana and talk about the sizes of fake breasts. What powerful She-model shouldn’t garner a little criticism in the public arena now and then? Murphy Brown was pivotal in leading women in the direction of independence, and if you want to do the same, this is your look. Lucky for you, there are only a few simple steps to find Murphy’s signature style.
Lesson 1: There is no such thing as too much teasing. Here in the South we say, “The closer to Jesus, the better we like it,” and obviously Murphy took that heart.
Lesson 2: Button that collar all the way up. Unless you’re celebrating ‘Ladies’ Night with your girlfriends, there’s no reason to show so all that decolletage.
Lesson 3: Of course, if you were up late watching reruns of Miami Vice, you could always pop that baby.
Lesson 4: Garish sweaters will ensure that you never go unnoticed at the office. Better yet? The incomparable sweater vest. I’d suggest doing as Murphy’s done in the picture above and accenting the most random color in the palette and using it in your accessories (Read: Big Earrings).
And finally, when you’re all worn out after a long day of being the most powerful woman in the room, pop your Keds up on that marble-topped table and turn on that ghetto blaster. After all, you deserve it!
You can now be assured that in Thursday’s 9am meeting no one will be picturing you as a sexy nurse. You can thank me later!